Management Farm House
My Farm
Rescue
Marketplace
Trades
Contracts
Bids
Help
Stop chatterin' and return to my farmin'!
Community
 
 SearchSearch Forum & Players   MemberlistMemberlist 
 My FarmMy Farm   Log in to check PMLog in to check PM   

Eternity Waits: A short story I wrote
Goto page 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7  Next
 
Post new topic   Reply to topic    sandboxfarm Forum Index -> Story Time
View previous topic :: View next topic  

Do you want me to continue this series of short stories?
Heck yeah! PLEASE post the next one soon!
68%
 68%  [ 15 ]
Um NO, duh you suck you stupid *&$%#@!
4%
 4%  [ 1 ]
I honestly don't care.
18%
 18%  [ 4 ]
ummmmm.....
9%
 9%  [ 2 ]
Total Votes : 22

Author Message
Knight



Joined: 08 Aug 2008
Posts: 70

PostPosted: Tue Oct 07, 2008 9:05 pm    Post subject: Eternity Waits: A short story I wrote Reply with quote

ok, i have a bit of a gift for writing (hope you people agree) and i love the story time forum! I can't get enough, so this is my 3rd topic i've posted on here....hope you all like it.


Eternity Waits
Chapter 1
...He looked up, perfect blue eyes filled with sorrow. I couldn't stand to see him like this. He was indestructable, he was unstoppable, or so I had thought. But here we were now, trapped, caged like animals, waiting for death. I reached out to him, ran my hand through his soft, carmel colored hair then down to his cheek. I knew he was worried only about me, but i wasn't afraid. "Don't worry," I said knowing that he would anyway, "Eternity waits."...

The day I first saw him I knew my life would never be the same. All of my friends were talking about the "new kid" but none of them had mentioned how amazingly beautiful he was. He was perfect, he was an angel, and from the moment I first looked into his blue eyes I knew that I was in love with him.
Over the next few weeks (or was it months?) I felt as though my heart was being ripped from my chest. He was perfect in every way. He was handsome beyond belief, the smartest person in every class, good at sports, kind....I had no chance. Why would someone like him ever love someone like me?
I wasn't the prettiest, or the smartest, and I couldn't even catch a ball. I mean, I wasn't ugly, but I still wasn't beautiful enough. I wasn't completely stupid, but I wasn't smart enough. I wasn't in bad physical shape, but....I don't even want to start on sports. There was no way he could ever love me.
At first I tried to ignore my feelings, but I didn't work. It made it even worse. I would find myself in the middle of class drawing his face when I was supposed to be doing pre algebra, or science, or language. I would stare at the back of his head at lunch then realize how pathetic I was when I realized I was thinking about what a perfect head it was. Nothing could suppress my feelings. I dreaded the day when they would explode.
His name was Matt. A good name that had once seemed ordinary but was now extraordinary. I nearly jumped and laughed and danced with joy the day he started talking to me. We were soon great friends, and though my heart nearly burst with joy every time he called me his name for me "Nerd", I wanted more. I wanted to be more than friends. I wanted him to love me as much as I loved him.
I thought that that would never happen and told myself that we would always be, "just friends", but that never completely killed the hope in my heart. I always thought about him as mine, protectivly. I knew that I would be willing to die for him.
Gosh, I wish I had known that he felt the same a lot sooner.



Well that is the begining. If it sucks than post that it does or vote about it. If you are interested in it and want to hear more thatn vote or post about it. I want to know how everybody feels about it. If you like my work please tell your friends to read it. It's really encouraging to me. Ch 2 coming soon if you guys want it, but you gotta lemme know. Thanks,
-Knight
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
lorraine



Joined: 01 May 2007
Posts: 532

PostPosted: Wed Oct 08, 2008 1:42 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

come on can you post it already i want to hear the rest of the story!!!
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Dancing Water



Joined: 08 Oct 2008
Posts: 8

PostPosted: Wed Oct 08, 2008 6:39 pm    Post subject: I was right! Reply with quote

Omg I knew it I wa sooooo right! Hopefully u know who this is! But omg I will never let u forget this! I am like bursting w/ joy at the moment! I am a very smart person!! U should totally ask him to the dance though! And I LOVE ur story! Anywayz c u tomorrow! Very Happy
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Knight



Joined: 08 Aug 2008
Posts: 70

PostPosted: Thu Oct 09, 2008 7:50 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I am SOOOOO not asking him to the dance! Even if i wanted to my mom wouldn't let me!

Note:For people who r reading this and have no clue what we r talking about, me and Dancing Water r great friends who go to the same school. Very Happy
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Knight



Joined: 08 Aug 2008
Posts: 70

PostPosted: Fri Oct 10, 2008 7:56 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

K, here's Ch 2 everybody!


Eternity Waits
Chapter 2

It seemed like an ordinary day to me, I talked with Matt (a lot), I talked with my other friends (a bit), and I walked home after drama sighing thinking that no matter how much I hoped that he would love me it would never happen. My world now seemed to revolve around him. It felt like a knife in the chest every time somebody asked if we were going out and I had to answer no.
So I was walking home when I decided to take the long way. We had nothing going on tonight and my mom wouldn't care if I were a bit late, (I hoped). So I started walking the long way, then I decided to just stop by a nearby gas station for something to drink.
When I got there there were only a few people, not very unusual. The people themselves were though. At first I thought they were goth, or a gang or something like that. But their bodies, dressed all in black never twitched, never moved, and their eyes, all a weird grey color followed me. There were five of them, all guys, and lemme tell ya they gave me the creeps!
I quickly grab a vitamin water, payed for it and got the heck outa there. I walked quickly as I could, and after a while I noticed that my feet were carrying me towards the school, towards Matt's house, no not my own, but Matt's!!! I scolded myself, what was I thinking?! From here my house was closer, but there was an odd secure feeling I have when I'm around him and I was instinctively getting as close as possible.
As I was walking I felt a weird cold feeling come over me. I shivered then looked behind me. Ok, I admit it, I freaked! But wouldn't you if one of those dudes from the gas station was following you? He was half a block behind me, standing perfectly still. The wind didn't seem to touch him. He was like a statue and if I hadn't seen at the gas station I wouldn't have believed he was real.
I stopped looking at him and started walking faster than before. The cold feeling followed me, I shivered again and glanced behind me. He was walking. I froze trying to deny that this was real, but I knew all of it was real, I could feel it. The guy walked with perfect, deadly, grace. His face remained expressionless, his dark clothes and hair unmoving in the wind.
I turned and ran. I couldn't think of anything else to do. My mind worked to think of plans, worked to find good ones at least, it came up with stupid ones too easy. I glanced quickly over my shoulder, he was gaining! He was walking so fast.....Wait, I looked again. He was still WALKING, and I was SPRINTING! I'm not the fastest person in the world but I'm not that slow!
There had to be a logical explanation. He was a demon of some sort or....ummm, is him being a demon a logical explanation? Probably not. I kept on running. If this guy (or demon as my mind kept wanting to call him) wanted me for some reason, I wasn't going to make it any easier for him then it already seemed to be.
As I have already let you know, I am pathetic. I tripped on my own shoelace and did a face plant. Needless to say when I finally rolled over the dude was standing right there stareing at me with his head a bit tilted in a way that was totally scary. I of course, flipped out and tried to crawl away or make some feeble attempt to escape. Then I really flipped out when I discovered that I couldn't move. And all this time he stands there and stares at me! Can't he say something like they do in the movies? You know a little "I'm going to kill you", or "I vant to suck your blood!" or something like that so I can scream and we get this over with!
Then in an amazingly quick, lithe motion he crouches down over me and asks, "Who are you?" in a very menacing voice. I felt my mouth move but no words came out. I felt the cold loosen a bit.
"What is your name?" he asked. That ticked me off. He follows me, scares the crap out of me, and it's all just so he can ask me my name.
So I glared at him and said, "Bob." Lemme tell you, the look on his face almost made me laugh out loud. It was SO funny. Ha ha, yeah it wasn't so funny afterwards.
He snarled at me, no joke, snarled like an animal, and said, "NO ONE DEFIES US!" and then he knocked me out.

Hmmm....note to self:Don't give these dudes attitude, they don't like it. Mom always did say I have an attitude problem.



That's it for this chapter, hope you all liked it. I'll have the next one coming soon, wouldn't want to keep you hangin now would I? Twisted Evil
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
lorraine



Joined: 01 May 2007
Posts: 532

PostPosted: Fri Oct 10, 2008 10:14 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

yeah well are you jst makin this up or is it real cause that's just plain freaky!!! Confused Shocked Cool
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Knight



Joined: 08 Aug 2008
Posts: 70

PostPosted: Sat Oct 11, 2008 1:49 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

It's all just a story set in 1st person. Although a certain character is inspired by a real person. Very Happy
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Dancing Water



Joined: 08 Oct 2008
Posts: 8

PostPosted: Sat Oct 11, 2008 3:07 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Great chapter! I did not expect that when u told me u had a new chapter! Oh and I know who the person is and he called me mean after the bell rang and we were going into the hall and then I asked y am I mean and he didn't answer! Crying or Very sad *huff* Anywayz c ya on Gracefull Day
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Knight



Joined: 08 Aug 2008
Posts: 70

PostPosted: Sat Oct 11, 2008 3:15 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

he probably called u mean because u r trying to be a matchmaker!!! Evil or Very Mad
well, c u on Monday
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Knight



Joined: 08 Aug 2008
Posts: 70

PostPosted: Sat Oct 11, 2008 4:04 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ok peepsols....here's ch 3! told u i wouldn't keep u hangin long.


Eternity Waits
Chapter 3


I didn't open my eyes right away when I woke up. I didn't know what I would see. From my experiances lately it could have been a pink world filled with magic ponies and cotton candy, or some evil clown could be standing over me with a knife.
I stifled a groan, I had just about the worst headache ever. I thought about the creepy dude who had followed me in that weird little nightmare I had. It was just about then that I noticed that this wasn't my queen sized water bed, the air smelled funny, and I was cold. I said a bunch of cuss words in my head. It wasn't a nightmare! It was real!
I opened one eye the tiniest bit. No, I wasn't in an evil lair, that's a plus. I opened it all the way. I was in a hospital room. Hmm, that's interesting, it's not everyday that you end up in a hospital and don't know how you got there. And then I heard a wonderful voice that made me forget any worries or questions I had just had.
I turned my head and checked very thoroughly to make sure every detail was just right, to make sure he was really there. I had a sudden urge to poke him just to make sure. Yep, you guessed it, Matt was sitting there next to my hospital bed.
So being the idiot that I am I asked, "Whateryoudoinhere?" really fast and all munched up together.
He smiled and ignored my question, "How are you feeling?" he asked.
I made sure to say each word slow enough and not smushed together, "Umm, fine other than the fact that I have a killer headache, and I'm in a hospital and I'm not exactly sure why."
I caught a look that might have been relief cross his face. "So you don't remember anything?" he asked. I swear he was almost hopeful.
"Um, I think I remember being followed by this one dude and then being hit on the head."
"What do you mean you "think"?" he asked cautiously.
All the sudden I knew I could and had to, tell him everything. "The dude was so creepy he just didn't seem real," I started, shuddering as I thought of him, "I was at that gas station by the school and there were these five guys there. They kept watching me and they really freaked me out."
"What did they look like?" he interupted.
I looked at his face, how could someone be so beautiful even when they're frowning? "Well, all of them were really pale, and had weird gray eyes," I started. His frown deepened. "They all had at least longish hair, and they all wore black." It was my turn to frown as I made my mind drag up the details I didn't want to think about. "And they never moved. They were all perfectly still, they didn't even twitch. Anyways, they scared me so I left pretty quick. Then I got this weird feeling, and I looked behind me and one of them was following me."
"Which one?" Matt asked, his face hard.
"Matt, what's going on? Do you know them? What do they..." Matt raised his hand to stop my endless fountain of questions. "I didn't want you involved in this but now you are. I'll tell you everything you should know, but first you have to tell me everything you remember, ok?"
I nodded, and he repeated his question, "Which one followed you?"
"He was medium height for a dude, black hair, his eyes were a dark grey, he musta been about..." I paused, I couldn't put an age to him. Come to think of it, I couldn't put an age to any of them.
"I donno how old he was."
Matt nodded as if he had expected this. "Ok, so then what happened?"
"I started running, and he caught up anyways." I blushed before I continued, "I kinda tripped and fell on my face, and when I looked up he was standing there. He just stared at me for a while, then he asked who I was and what my name is."
Matt turned pale, "And what did you answer?" he asked.
I blushed again, "I was mad, so I said Bob. He didn't like that, and he yelled "NO ONE DEFIES US!" and now I'm here....ta da."
Matt looked just about as shocked as the creep had when I answered Bob, then he started laughing at me, a typical Matt thing to do. When he finally quit laughing he got serious again, but I could tell he was still amused. "You have some serious guts Nerd," he said, "Very few people could or would stand up to one of them like that."
"Ok," I said, "My turn for questions. What happened afterwards?"
"I was outside, heard a bunch of noise, went to see what it was and found you laying there. I took you to my house and we called an ambulance."
I was in his house!!! Ugh! It was just my luck that I had been unconcious the entire time. I looked at him, looked into his eyes. He was lying, or at least not telling me everything. Oh well, I would get the truth out him soon enough. Maybe I could blackmail him into telling me by threatening to tell everyone what his grandma's nickname for him was..."Ok, question mumber two, who are those dudes?"
"I'm not telling you."
"What?! you promised!!!"
"I promised to tell you what you needed to know, I didn't say when I would tell you."
I just glared at him as he smiled and went to tell everyone that I was awake.


I was SOOO telling everyone his grandma's nickname for him. Why are mysterious guys so hot on movies and so annoying in real life?!



Well that's ch 3! ch 4 coming soon. If u guys bombard me with msgs and replies like u did for the last few chs I'll get it done faster. Thank fr readin everybody! Very Happy
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
lorraine



Joined: 01 May 2007
Posts: 532

PostPosted: Mon Oct 13, 2008 6:55 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

i really want to read the rest!!! man, who are those freaky dudes????
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Knight



Joined: 08 Aug 2008
Posts: 70

PostPosted: Tue Oct 14, 2008 6:55 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

The next ch is coming soon, have no fear....all will be told before i'm done Cool
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Knight



Joined: 08 Aug 2008
Posts: 70

PostPosted: Tue Oct 14, 2008 7:46 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

ok everybody....ch 4 comin right up....

Eternity Waits
Chapter 4


It turns out that I didn't have a concussion or any injuries other than some bruises and scrapes from when I fell. Matt left as soon as they said I was fine and I glared at him until he was out of sight. My mom of course, was in tears and doing a pretty good impression of Niagra Falls. "Oh my poor baby! I'm so sorry you had to walk home all alone...I'm so glad that nice young man was nearby and found you! Ohhh..."
Yeah, it was pretty annoying, just like the fact that the "nice young man" refused to tell me anything, including any part of the truth. I know that what happened wasn't normal, that something weird was going on. And I had a feeling that Matt was involved with it.
Then I went home where I was bombarded with calls from all of my friends. The conversations were all the same...Yes, it's true that I was attacked....Yes, I'm out of the hospital....No, I wasn't hurt....And then one of my closer friends asked the unavoidable half-question. I was getting sick of calls when my good friend Lynzi called. She asked if I was ok, and all that crap, and then she asked another question. "So I heard that it was Matt who found you....was it really him?"
I sighed then answered, "Yes, Lynzi, it was really Matt."
And then she exploded into an endless fountain of words, and wouldn't shut up. "Ohmigosh! He totally likes you! Didn't I tell you he likes you?! You are SOO lucky! I can see it now! You and Matt growing up and getting married, with me as the brides maid....You two are like SOO cute together. I can't believe this is happening! You like him and he likes you and you'll live happily ever after with the hottie from a fairy tale, wow! Ohmigosh! Did he like wait for you to wake up in the hospital?"
"Yeah, he did." If she had been crazy before, she was going to explode now. Three....two.....one....
"OHMIGOSH!!!! I can't believe it! You guys are SOO totally meant for eachother! I TOLD you he likes you! He actually waited with you while you were unconcious, that is SOO cool!"
"Lynzi, he was probably just worried, anyone would have done the same thing." Was I trying to convince her, or myself?
"No way, he sooo likes you. He STARES at you during class."
"Lynz, I....WHAT? He stares at me? Why didn't you tell me before?"
"Yep! He does, especially during World Geo., Pre. Alg., and just about every other class where he sits where he can. Lemme tell ya, it'pretty cute, the way he just gazes at you..."
"Wow...." I couldn't think of anything else to say. What if he felt the way about me that I felt about him?
"Lynzi, you are the most amazing friend ever."
"You know it! I'll let you go to sleep and dream about you future husband....dum dum da dum, dum dum da dum..."
"Ok, bye Lynz."
"Bye!"
I plopped myself down on my bed. What a day. I sighed and put my pajamas on, turned off the light and went to bed. Lynzi's words echoed in my head "...You guys are SOO totally meant for eachother!...Lemme tell ya, it's pretty cute, the way he just gazes at you..."
I sighed again, I had been doing that a lot lately. Huh, it's funny how right friends are sometimes, because when I dreamed, I dreamed of Matt...

I was running as fast as I could, my breath coming in short gasps. I couldn't run like this for much longer. I looked behind me, seeing exactly the opposite of what I wanted to see, a dark figure walking, gaining on me. I tripped, and fell. I rolled back over ready to put up a fight. I relaxed instantly when I saw who was there. Matt was leaning over me, his breath warm on my face. He smiled then touched my cheek, ever so gently. "Don't worry," he said, "They will never hurt you, I will never let them hurt you. You're safe now."
I wrapped my arms around his neck, and hugged him as tight as I could. He was all that was real right now, warm and comforting. I loosened my death grip on him a bit and leaned back. "You'll never leave me?" I asked.
"Never, ever," he answered.
Then all of the sudden, something was wrong. An icy cold came and Matt felt more like a giant ice cube than a human being. I looked around then back at his face. Then I dropped my arms from his neck, and felt like an icy hand was choking me.
Matt's eyes, which were usually a brilliant blue, were grey. And his smile, usually so warm and friendly, was cruel, lips parted revealing sharp canine teeth. I tried to yell, I tried to run, to cry, to do anything, but I couldn't. "They will never have you," he said, in a cold voice that couldn't possibly be his. "You're all mine." Then with another crooked, cruel smile, he lunged for my throat.


Sometimes friends are so wrong about something you want to slap them across the face.





That's ch 4 peoples! Everybody give a big thanks to Dancing Water, as she is the real Lynzi. Thanks for being an awesome friend Lynz, you rock! (even when you're trying to hook me up with someone) Wink
Ch 5 coming soon!
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
lorraine



Joined: 01 May 2007
Posts: 532

PostPosted: Wed Oct 15, 2008 3:13 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

wierd freky dream .... watch that's how it's going to end up in some way...





(not that you're story isn't great cause it is Knight!!!)
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Cecelia



Joined: 16 Dec 2006
Posts: 1487

PostPosted: Wed Oct 15, 2008 3:40 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

wow! I love it so far!!! Please post the next chapter soon! Smile
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Display posts from previous:   
Post new topic   Reply to topic    sandboxfarm Forum Index -> Story Time All times are GMT - 6 Hours
Goto page 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7  Next
Page 1 of 7

 
Jump to:  
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum


Orbis Games
Privacy Policy | Terms of Service | Player Policies |
Sign In!
This section is Powered by phpBB © 2001, 2005 phpBB Group