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ChocolateGal
Joined: 29 Jul 2007
Posts: 1868
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 Posted: Sat Apr 24, 2010 4:46 am Post subject: I need help... of the professional sort |
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I think I have Depression. I've been feeling really down, sad and worried for about 3 years (since I was 12). Here's a test I took (not relying on this for actual information):
Major Depression: Very High
Dysthymia: High
Bipolar Disorder: High-Moderate
Cyclothymia: High
Seasonal Affective Disorder: Very High
Postpartum Depression: N/A
I'm not looking for sympathy, but I'm looking for help. If there is a phycologist/GP/phycologist-in-training, I'd really appreciate some help.
Mods, if this in inappropriate, please remove it. We could converse in PM's.
If anyone here has actually had depression (that they've been diagnosed with, not 'Oh I'm feeling a bit depressed today') I would appreciate any stories, help from you.
As I've said again, I'm not looking for any sympathy, but I've been piecing back puzzle and this may be a cause. If you (a GP) want to ask me questions, feel free. I don't have a problem for it.
This is not a thread for random comments, this is a serious thread. |
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Cosmosxx
Joined: 28 Apr 2009
Posts: 1228
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| Posted: Sat Apr 24, 2010 9:44 am Post subject: |
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Hi Choco, and first of all kudos for being brave and posting this.
Although I haven't been diagnosed with anything even although a few times in my life I have been prescribed anti depressants, I can certainly empathize with major depression, and at times feeling worthless or suicidal, or just unable to do everyday things. Some days I can't get out of bed, other days I'm so angry with everyone and everything... 
My mum is bi-polar, so I have a lot of experience dealing with it, as we grew up with it always in our lives.
My OH whom I've lived with for 3 years is also bi-polar, and suffers from severe manic depression, I'm actually down as a carer for him, and help him do everyday stuff that can be difficult with his condition.
I am always here if you need to talk, as an understanding non judgmental ear.
Chin up honey. There are plenty of resources for this as well as people who can help you. I'd say first step talk to your doctor. 
*Hugs* |
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Cocodri
Joined: 03 Jan 2007
Posts: 551
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| Posted: Sat Apr 24, 2010 11:06 am Post subject: |
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My official diagnosis is bipolar with PTSD and undifferentiated personality disorders secondary to severe abuse.
I'm 50 years old and I'm still here, although it's been close a time or two.
I second the motion to talk to your Dr. and parents, and any adult you trust to take you seriously.
Let me throw out a couple of cautions. You are still an adolescent if my addition is correct. We are now finding out that giving psychosomatic drugs to young people is having serious effects in their later life, so I would be very leery of "just take a pill".
You mentioned bipolar as a possibility. One thing I experienced with bipolar is that I was originally diagnosed as depressed. In my case, the depression is far more obvious than the manic phases - it's pretty hard to ignore suicide attempts. The problem there is if you are bipolar and they treat the depression, there is a definate possibility of creating a very out of control manic phase, so make sure they are really sure it is depression and NOT bipolar before they stick you on "happy pills".
Something else I am seeing with depression in my friends lately is they will put you on those pills when the depression has a definate cause in your life. You need a therapist, a counselor, someone you can talk to that can help you decide if there is a cause such as past trauma or present problems that can be dealt with to eliminate the depression rather than just tossing pills at it forever.
A problem with bipolar is they just want to slam you on Lithium and then a drug cocktail. Before I allowed them to do that I did a lot of research online and talked to people on and off the drugs. My decision was to not take them. I am able to do this because I have a lot of great support from my husband and am fortunate to be fairly functional most of the time. (There are days when I look around and think I am a lot more sane and sensible than the so called normal people around me)
Just a suggestion that, as far as I know, can't hurt. The Mayo Clinic did a study that showed Evening Primrose Oil - a very common supplement - in doses as low as 1500mg a day can control bipolar. I've been taking it for years and while I do still have some ups and downs it definately helps. It also helps with "female problems" which is one reason you can buy it at the local Walmart. This is not meant to replace a physicians advice or the help of a professional - it just might help you feel a bit better until you get real help and a correct diagnosis.
Most of all, do not give up control over your own life and decisions. Before just taking whatever the first Dr says - do some research, and look into yourself and see if you feel s/he is right. Don't be afraid to ask to see another Dr. or a different sort of therapist or counselor.
And I second the kudos for having the courage - and intelligence - to seek help.
Feel free to PM me if you want to talk.
Blessedbe
Cosmosxx I'm editing because I also want to throw some kudos and love your way for being the kind, generous, patient person who can support someone like me and make it possible for us to continue to function in the world. The bipolar people I know who have a support person are always "better" than those who are on their own. You are contributing more than you know. *smooch* |
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Cosmosxx
Joined: 28 Apr 2009
Posts: 1228
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| Posted: Sat Apr 24, 2010 11:23 am Post subject: |
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| Cocodri wrote: |
You are still an adolescent if my addition is correct. We are now finding out that giving psychosomatic drugs to young people is having serious effects in their later life, so I would be very leery of "just take a pill".
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Very nicely put Cocodri. I particularly agree with the above quote.
I recently watched Louis Theroux's (for all who don't know, a superb journalist and documentary maker for the BBC) documentary on America's medicated kids. That's the title not my opinion.
It was shocking how many were misdiagnosed, even at the tender age of 4 and 5 and their doctors were just throwing pills at them, without really looking at what may be the cause, some deep rooted behavioral rather than mental issues..... very eye opening. We in the UK are going the same way....so sad.
So make sure you are very well informed before rushing into anything Choco.
*Hugs again*
Edit - Thanks Cocodri.  , my OH says I certainly make a difference to his life, some days it is hard on both of us, I have my ups and down's too...but when you love someone it doesn't matter, as I'm sure your husband knows too.
I just hate how a lot of people look down on mental illness, and see it as something to be ashamed of... I want to stand up for everyone...
*Smooch back* |
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Cocodri
Joined: 03 Jan 2007
Posts: 551
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| Posted: Sat Apr 24, 2010 11:48 am Post subject: |
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| Quote: | I just hate how a lot of people look down on mental illness, and see it as something to be ashamed of... I want to stand up for everyone...
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Amen. I tell very few people about my problems, and if I do I often just put it all off to the abuse PTSD because somehow people find that less "scary". And some people really are just SCARED of mentally ill people.
I also get some negativity from other bipolar people who have chosen to do the drug cocktail. I would never ever put anyone down for that - I have my reasons for choosing not to go that route, some of which are personal such as my many drug allergies. For some people, that is really the route to go and it can improve their life so much. It just isn't for me. Which is why I don't apply for my Disability either - as in some states they are now forcing you to take the drugs or they cut off your funds. No thank you.
As I said before, there are days I look around me at how some people act and think, "And THEY say I am crazy?" LOL
The whole thing of giving these drugs to young people scares me to death. I always think of a friend of mine whose college roommate had been on the Ritalin all through school. My friend did his homework because this poor guy could barely read and could not remember ANY of his childhood. Then a friend of mine who had a little boy that the school refused to let him attend if he was not on his drugs. She took him off and between her and his Dad they kept him happy and occupied - he just needed a lot of attention and something to keep him busy all the time. In fact - he was SMART, smart, smart.
And for myself - I've always felt that what I wanted more than anything and what would do me the most good would be a therapist I could just TALK to - about the abuse, the depression, the suicidal thoughts. Because, as my poor DH can tell you, sometimes all I need is to talk it out and know someone cares and listened.
I guess the problem with that these days is the insurance company doesn't understand "I need someone to talk to", they do understand "this pill, 3x a day, so many mg". It does cost a lot for a therapist to talk to an hour a week, and a lot less to pick up your prescription refill once a month. Sigh. But what makes more sense? Talk it out and maybe even get better and more able to cope and handle your life - or take a pill that helps for a while, then the dosage has to be upped or you have side effects and they give you pills for that...
And sorry, Choco for kidnapping your thread. For you, most of all, find someone you can really talk to. And as you may have figured out from all this above - sometimes someone you can really talk to, who really listens, is the best medicine. Yeah, it's scary sometimes to share these feelings with someone. And there will be people who don't understand. But trust me, the Universe takes care of us - there is someone in your circle, or someone you will meet soon who is that person who can talk to and trust. You've done the most important thing - you've reached out and said "I need help" - now the Universe will provide. And, of course, you can "talk" to me here any time.[/quote] |
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ChocolateGal
Joined: 29 Jul 2007
Posts: 1868
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| Posted: Sat Apr 24, 2010 9:33 pm Post subject: |
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Firstly, I'd like to say thank you to both of you, as they have moved me so much. *hugs*
| Quote: | | Chin up honey. There are plenty of resources for this as well as people who can help you. I'd say first step talk to your doctor. |
& | Quote: | | I second the motion to talk to your Dr. and parents, and any adult you trust to take you seriously. |
The only problem is, my GP lives like a 20 minute drive away. And I don't think my parents take my seriously in anything I do. My friends don't either, as I put on a 'happy face' most of the time. However, I'm thinking of seeing my school counselor, before I even feel brave enough to see anyone else.
| Quote: | | Let me throw out a couple of cautions. You are still an adolescent if my addition is correct. We are now finding out that giving psychosomatic drugs to young people is having serious effects in their later life, so I would be very leery of "just take a pill". |
& | Quote: | | I guess the problem with that these days is the insurance company doesn't understand "I need someone to talk to", they do understand "this pill, 3x a day, so many mg". It does cost a lot for a therapist to talk to an hour a week, and a lot less to pick up your prescription refill once a month. Sigh. But what makes more sense? Talk it out and maybe even get better and more able to cope and handle your life - or take a pill that helps for a while, then the dosage has to be upped or you have side effects and they give you pills for that... |
I'm not really on the look-out for pills, just people to understand (if) I have depression. I want to people to finally understand who I truly am, which is the person who I have cleverly covered up for so many years. I've had so many names called over the years, fat, ugly, whale, stupid, idiot, a person who a stupid accent and who should shut up, and many other comments about my weight, look and personality. I decided to start this thread after so many PM's with one of my closest friends on here, Queso. I've really let out all my emotions into the PMs, and I thought I really need more help.
| Quote: | | Something else I am seeing with depression in my friends lately is they will put you on those pills when the depression has a definate cause in your life. You need a therapist, a counselor, someone you can talk to that can help you decide if there is a cause such as past trauma or present problems that can be dealt with to eliminate the depression rather than just tossing pills at it forever. |
There hasn't been a major cause, but I'm not sure what the cause actually is.
| Quote: | | You mentioned bipolar as a possibility. One thing I experienced with bipolar is that I was originally diagnosed as depressed. In my case, the depression is far more obvious than the manic phases - it's pretty hard to ignore suicide attempts. The problem there is if you are bipolar and they treat the depression, there is a definate possibility of creating a very out of control manic phase, so make sure they are really sure it is depression and NOT bipolar before they stick you on "happy pills". |
I was originally scared when the test showed bipolar as a possibility, but as I researched into it more, I realised that there was two types, the mood change one and the depressive one. I'm finding this hard to say, but I've have had thoughts about what the world would be like if I were dead/weren't there, and come to the conclusion that it wouldn't be much different. However, when I get really angry on something, I get really angry, and just wished it would die or I could break it. This can include people and objects. I haven't had a rage in quite a while though, but I find that embarrassing to say that either.
| Quote: | | Just a suggestion that, as far as I know, can't hurt. The Mayo Clinic did a study that showed Evening Primrose Oil - a very common supplement - in doses as low as 1500mg a day can control bipolar. I've been taking it for years and while I do still have some ups and downs it definately helps. It also helps with "female problems" which is one reason you can buy it at the local Walmart. This is not meant to replace a physicians advice or the help of a professional - it just might help you feel a bit better until you get real help and a correct diagnosis. |
Yay! My mum has actually got a big container with those in them. I could start to take them, and see what happens, as I've done research on them and found them pretty safe. I won't take anything unless it's safe. However, just between the women of his thread, I'm getting pretty worried about 'lady problems', just because of my age (nearly 15) and the lack of it at the moment. My mum was two weeks of 16, so I'm not really, really, really concerned just yet.
| Quote: | | I just hate how a lot of people look down on mental illness, and see it as something to be ashamed of... I want to stand up for everyone... |
I guess I'm scared of that happening to show my emotions. I just want to be really, truly happy for once.
Thank you both again for how much you've helped me both, and I don't mind the kid napping at all. I've read and learnt how much you all have said.
*hugs* |
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wolfgirl159357
Joined: 07 Aug 2009
Posts: 19967
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| Posted: Sun Apr 25, 2010 11:12 am Post subject: |
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| I am open for disscusion my sister who lives with me is going to school to be a phychiatrist and i am sure she would love to help you just shoot me a PM and i will have her reply for you. |
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Cocodri
Joined: 03 Jan 2007
Posts: 551
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| Posted: Sun Apr 25, 2010 8:24 pm Post subject: |
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[quote="ChocolateGal"]Firstly, I'd like to say thank you to both of you, as they have moved me so much. *hugs*
| Quote: | | Chin up honey. There are plenty of resources for this as well as people who can help you. I'd say first step talk to your doctor. |
& | Quote: | | I second the motion to talk to your Dr. and parents, and any adult you trust to take you seriously. |
The only problem is, my GP lives like a 20 minute drive away. And I don't think my parents take my seriously in anything I do. My friends don't either, as I put on a 'happy face' most of the time. However, I'm thinking of seeing my school counselor, before I even feel brave enough to see anyone else. [;quote]
That sounds like a good start. School counselors are trained to help, that's what they are there for. Sometimes they are overwhelmed with too many students though, so don't give up if s/he doesn't give you the response you need. Just keep trying. You might do a little research and see if there is a local mental health association, a suicide hotline, teen outreach, or one of those types of programs where you live. I dunno where you live
| Quote: | | I'm not really on the look-out for pills, just people to understand (if) I have depression. |
Actually I wasn't thinking you were looking for pills - just that it is an unfortunate thing that many professionals will just immediatly toss a pill at the problem instead of looking deeper. So I'm really glad to hear that you already have it in mind that that isn't the solution you are looking for.
| Quote: | | There hasn't been a major cause, but I'm not sure what the cause actually is. |
OTH didn't you just say that no one knows the real you, you put on a happy face, yet you are called names and derogatory comments made about your weight, looks, accent and so on. That can make anyone depressed! Also, it is something that your school really should be addressing - after all the publicity in the last few years about bullying in school, you'd think someone would have stepped in by now.
Having been the recipient of a lot of that myself - I know how deeply it cuts.
| Quote: |
I was originally scared when the test showed bipolar as a possibility, but as I researched into it more, I realised that there was two types, the mood change one and the depressive one. |
Again - you impress me with your good sense and intelligence. yes, there are a LOT of different levels of bipolar - and one person can move up and down, too - I have - as bipolar is strongly affected by stress and/or homones. This is a big reason why I never ever put anyone down who does do the drug cocktail because for some people there is no other way to cope. I'm fortunate and I know it.
And as far as the world not being any different without you. I know all this sounds trite - but it is because it is true. You are unique. You are you and there is no one else in the entire world just like you. You are here on this world at this time because there is something for you to do. You never know when something you have said or done will make a huge impression on someone - even when it was something you only did in passing and without thinking. A simple kindness. The right word at the right time. For all you know there is a girl or boy out there right this minute who did not have the courage to say what you have said - but who is following this thread with tears in their eyes and the new courage to go on and get help - and it will be because YOU had the courage to come out and ask. You never know.
| Quote: | | Just a suggestion that, as far as I know, can't hurt. The Mayo Clinic did a study that showed Evening Primrose Oil - |
| Quote: | | Yay! My mum has actually got a big container with those in them. |
There ya go!
Lot of smoochies and feel free to PM any time. If you want I'll share my email and if you are on gmail, too, then we can chat. |
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Vitani
Joined: 28 Nov 2006
Posts: 6665
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| Posted: Sun Apr 25, 2010 8:37 pm Post subject: |
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Oh Choccies, dear sweetheart....
*hugs*
You are extremely brave posting this. Seeing as You, Cos and Cocodri have been so brave....I will be too. I hope it helps
While it IS a possibility, not EVERY teenager will 'grow out of it' Teen angst is just that...But for some, its a deeper problem. Its not going to go away by itself. Asking for help is the first step. It can be one of the hardest.
I've struggled with OCD since I was 12 years old...With depression since I was 16...With PTSD since I was 17.
I've tried to take my own life more than once. One of those times, was while I was taking an anti depressant. An anti depressant known to potentially increase suicidal behaviours, especially in teens. Not great diagnosing on my GP's part. A GP is just that - Mental health is not their specialized field. I most definately advocate a psychologist/psychiatrist. A counsellor can only do so much - My high school counsellor advised me to "get a boyfriend, get a job, and get a hobby" so that I wouldn't have any time for "moping around". 2 weeks after that my mother found me curled in a ball on the floor, rocking back and forth shaking uncontrollably and barely able to breathe. ** I've edited this, only because in hindsight its probably TMI for a forum...And I don't want the thread getting locked, or the post deleted**
And it was STILL years before I sought professional help. Even I had convinced myself that I'd grow out of it, that it was normal for teens to be down in the dumps, etc. I got professional help at 22 years old....
Don't wait as long as I did...Don't be embarrased to tell friends and family. Some people won't understand, some will tell you to "get over it". Let it go. The ones that truly care and that understand, WILL do everything they can to help you. Theres no shame in needing medication - But be extremely careful about it. My advice would be exhaust natural avenues first...Medication for me was the first resort, not the last. I very nearly didn't get through it.
I took me a long time...I saw a psychologist twice a week, every week for 3 months, then once a week for 3 months, then once a fortnight, once a month, once every couple of months....
While I'm not 100% 'better' ( and never will be ) I'm ok with who I am now. I can lead a relatively normal life. I can recognize when I'm sliding downwards... And I know how to help myself get back on an even keel. And the times when I can't do it on my own...The help is there.
Never forget, that there is ALWAYS someone who cares about you - Even if it only seems like online friends at times. My PM box is ALWAYS open, to EVERYONE. I try to help...Its what I love. Sometimes a hug and a cookie is enough. Sometimes its not. Either way...
Mental illness is not something to be afraid of, embarrased about, or ashamed of. It's just like any other illness...You can't help it if you have it, and you need time to recover from it. One of the greatest challenges to recovery is just recognizing that you need help, and asking for it. You're already halfway there
Like the saying goes....Know me before you judge me.
*offers cookies and hugs all round*
There are things that I won't post for everyone to see ( not everything is forum suitable ) but if you would like to PM me Chocs, I'm happy to discuss things further with you in private, completely up to you
I ramble...Sorry 
Last edited by Vitani on Mon Apr 26, 2010 9:41 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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ChocolateGal
Joined: 29 Jul 2007
Posts: 1868
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| Posted: Mon Apr 26, 2010 5:20 am Post subject: |
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| Quote: | | I am open for disscusion my sister who lives with me is going to school to be a phychiatrist and i am sure she would love to help you just shoot me a PM and i will have her reply for you. |
Thanks Wolfie. Could you generally ask her if there's a specific list of questions that diagnose depression?
| Quote: | | Quote: | | Yay! My mum has actually got a big container with those in them. |
There ya go! |
Hazzar! I had one last night, and it made me feel a bit different.. better... for the rest of that day.
| Quote: | | That sounds like a good start. School counselors are trained to help, that's what they are there for. Sometimes they are overwhelmed with too many students though, so don't give up if s/he doesn't give you the response you need. Just keep trying. You might do a little research and see if there is a local mental health association, a suicide hotline, teen outreach, or one of those types of programs where you live. I dunno where you live |
Okay, I'll take that on board. I might try the one of the kids/teens helplines, as they're paid for helping teens like me! However, I'll still do some more research on depression and surrounding mental illnesses.
| Quote: | | OTH didn't you just say that no one knows the real you, you put on a happy face, yet you are called names and derogatory comments made about your weight, looks, accent and so on. That can make anyone depressed! Also, it is something that your school really should be addressing - after all the publicity in the last few years about bullying in school, you'd think someone would have stepped in by now. |
Hmm... very good point, I might take talk to the counsellor about that. *hugs for you*
| Quote: | | And as far as the world not being any different without you. I know all this sounds trite - but it is because it is true. You are unique. You are you and there is no one else in the entire world just like you. You are here on this world at this time because there is something for you to do. You never know when something you have said or done will make a huge impression on someone - even when it was something you only did in passing and without thinking. A simple kindness. The right word at the right time. For all you know there is a girl or boy out there right this minute who did not have the courage to say what you have said - but who is following this thread with tears in their eyes and the new courage to go on and get help - and it will be because YOU had the courage to come out and ask. You never know. |
Also, another good point. I'll think of this on my bad days.
| Quote: | | Lot of smoochies and feel free to PM any time. If you want I'll share my email and if you are on gmail, too, then we can chat. |
Hit you a PM about emails!
| Quote: | I've struggled with OCD since I was 12 years old...With depression since I was 16...With PTSD since I was 17.
I've tried to take my own life more than once. One of those times, was while I was taking an anti depressant. An anti depressant known to potentially increase suicidal behaviours, especially in teens. Not great diagnosing on my GP's part. A GP is just that - Mental health is not their specialized field. I most definately advocate a psychologist/psychiatrist. A counsellor can only do so much - My high school counsellor advised me to "get a boyfriend, get a job, and get a hobby" so that I wouldn't have any time for "moping around". 2 weeks after that my mother found me curled in a ball on the floor, rocking back and forth shaking uncontrollably and barely able to breathe. I had a bottle of pills beside me. |
Darling, you poor thing *huggles* I don't think I'd take pills to stop it all, as I've never really considered that a possibility. I just try and take it in my stride, and I haven't really complained/cried/threw a tantie to get it off my shoulders, I'm still keeping it all hidden and locked away.
| Quote: | | Never forget, that there is ALWAYS someone who cares about you - Even if it only seems like online friends at times. My PM box is ALWAYS open, to EVERYONE. I try to help...Its what I love. Sometimes a hug and a cookie is enough. Sometimes its not. Either way... |
Just hit you also a PM.
No problemo... 
I had a question to ask, but I can't remember it now. |
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Cosmosxx
Joined: 28 Apr 2009
Posts: 1228
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| Posted: Mon Apr 26, 2010 9:23 am Post subject: |
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PM me, and I'd also be happy to keep in touch through email...I too am a gmail user, and the chat function is quite cool.
As Tani said we may online only, but we do care.
*Hugs and cookies*
C |
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wolfgirl159357
Joined: 07 Aug 2009
Posts: 19967
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| Posted: Mon Apr 26, 2010 9:28 am Post subject: |
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| ya i will be sure too when seh gets home she is at work right now. |
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Auxatia
Joined: 12 Feb 2010
Posts: 53
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| Posted: Mon Apr 26, 2010 12:20 pm Post subject: |
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beforee i say anything, i really only read through the first couple of posts, as i'm lazy. so i apologize if i suggest anything that's already been said.. x..x
anyways.
being the fact i have depression and possibly schizophrenia and/or mania (what i actually have isn't known at this point in time, due to my age and the medical circumstances surrounding the situation), its not something that can just be diagnosed by yourself. i realize you're not actually "diagnosing" yourself with depression or anything, i'm just saying. xP
in response to the fact your parents won't take you seriously; no one really took my problems seriously until i began exhibiting suicidal behaviors. at that point, it was evident something was wrong with me, and that my parents should've payed more attention. you obviously don't want anything to go that far, but have you even sat down with your parents to discuss it? they might believe you're just being hypochondriaciatic (sp?) if you haven't, and therefore aren't taking it seriously.
if/when they do take you seriously (i'm sorry i sound so negative :/), professional help might not actually.. help. personally, going to a psychologist actually caused me to become more depressed. being the fact i felt i couldn't relate to the doctor, and therefore didn't -want- to see this doctor, she wasn't exactly helping the whole problem-- which was that i felt lonely. it ended up being my friends (the online ones, of course.. the real-life "friends" were absolutely no help and just thought i was going insane) were the ones that convinced me not to do stupid things. most of the time.
i'm not really sure if telling your friends and family is always the best thing to do.. while holding it back definitely isn't, just flat-out saying you think you're depressed can lead to issues. even if you aren't displaying negative behaviors (i.e., starving yourself, making suicidal gestures, etc., that can all relate to depression). many people just automatically think of the word "suicide" when someone is depressed, and you could end up on suicide watch when thats not even the problem. soo if you feel the need to talk to someone online about it before people in real life, i know of a site where people are really supportive and could help. if you wish to know of it, or just want to talk, pm me your email and i'll send the url? c:
ohh, and in case anyone was wondering/confused; psychologists and psychiatrista are both essentially "doctors", but psychologists aren't medical doctors, and psychiatrists are. xP |
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Sipphy
Joined: 22 Jun 2009
Posts: 161
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| Posted: Mon Apr 26, 2010 2:40 pm Post subject: |
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I would just like to add my two cents...
As a child I was diagnosed with depression. Years later I was rediagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder. Not a whole lot is known about BPD, and there is a lot of confusion about what is and isn't a myth.
One thing that some people think is a myth is that BPD makes for difficult patients. Based on my experiences, this is not a myth. I HATE therapists, counselors, psychologists, etc. I can tell myself that they are really nice people who just want to help, but still I scream and cry and want to throw things.
But as much as I would like to insist otherwise, I wouldn't have had a prayer of recovering on my own. I'm lucky my parents didn't give up on finding someone who could help me.
Your parents may not take you seriously now, but I beg you not to turn away from them. I know someone who has some problems (though she hasn't been officially diagnosed) and who relies on her online friends for solace. When her parents cut her off from the internet, things went from bad to worse. I saw a lot of pain that might have been deflected if she were on better terms with her mom. |
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Cocodri
Joined: 03 Jan 2007
Posts: 551
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| Posted: Thu Apr 29, 2010 10:09 am Post subject: |
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Just checking in - and everyone has made some great points.
I would like to add that - I do this and I think maybe you do, too - holding it in, putting on a happy face, and THINKING your parents and friends do not care doesn't work. You see, if you do not TELL them what is going on - they really don't know. People cannot read your mind - and expecting them to know you are having a problem without ever expressing that problem to them is unfair to you and to them. Give them a chance. Open up. Risk it. You'll find a couple things out really fast - who your real friends and the real people of value in your life are. They will offer you help, listen, be concerned and do everything in their power for you even if it isn't much. Some people will draw away, from fear, from prejudice, from ignorance, from pure selfishness sometimes I hate to say. Those people, you don't need 'em in your life. They are not your real friends, however much you may care for them, because they don't return the feelings.
I would expect your parents to offer help and love. If not - there are a couple of things to consider. One is that even parents can get wrapped up in their own problems and not have the available attention/emotion/ability to deal with yours. There is even the possibility that they do not want to hear what you are saying BECAUSE it sounds so much like their own feelings at your age, which they may still be struggling with, struggling to conceal. More and more we are finding that many mental illnesses are inherited. If your parents have never dealt with their own problems, they are afraid of yours simply because they feel like they can't help you - since they haven't found a solution themselves. All this bit is pure speculation and feel free to chuck it out if it doesn't apply. Obviously, I don't know your parents so I can hardly do much more than guess.
And always, much hugs, blessings, and good thoughts.
Vitani - kudos for courage. |
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