dead

[milon]

this is the worse I've ever felt. I feel dead, and I understand why we're only given on heart and a first impression. unfortunately, in the process of ripping it out, I neglected to stop the bleeding.

and there are no medications and insufficent blood supply.

crying nonstop for the last two days, and I'm in limbo. he says he just needs to step away and lighten his mood for atleast the weekend...with another girl.

I feel so idotic. inadequate.

he was my sun, my stars. the velvet of a storyteller's voice and the only sincere gift time had offered me, ever.

and what? I took him for granted. and now he's gone, and I don't think there will even be a sidelong glance.

promise me the friendship you have no compassion for..try to tell me the truth, stop feeding me the lies, because you place happiness above all else? I realized that you'll tell me things, even if they aren't true just because you know that's what I want to hear.

I feel dead. hollowed out, and if I don't run out of oxygen, I'll surely choke in the tears.

take me back. please, please just take me back...

[Cecelia]

wow that sounds tough............. First off if this guy is ready to walk off on you AND be with another girl after difficulties then he's probably not worth you but I don't know him and I really don't know you so yeah. I'm hoping things work out and if they don't;don't blame yourself. I am the queen of blaming myself and believe me it gets you nowhere at all except where you already are which is feeling useless and hopeless. I know you think I'm just saying that I want you here cause its what you want to hear but thats not true. We REALLY DO want you here where would Sandbox be without milon/Kat? I'm not going to tell you to get over him cause thats near to impossible anyways but remember that we do love you and I'm not just saying that. You're in my prayers and I'm praying now so I won't forget Try to hold on to the good times even if they are years away from you........

Cecelia~thellamallady~

[Queen Icefire 411]

This is tough, i know how you feel. I hope that your sadness will give you also the strength to go on and understand that everyone on here wants you stay HERE. I hope you get better over this...

[Vitani]

Oh my Kitty-Kat.....*envelopes you in a hug* Come talk to me...You know where I am....

[Daisy Rabbit Mae]

sorry... *hugs and gives cookies and gives a puppy and a bunny and lots of money* lol. *stuffs cake in ur pockets and runs away*

Hope u feel happy soon or it gets better,
Daisy

[A. L. Aljan]

I'm not going to spout the trite "everything happens for a reason" dribble here, but I've learned one immutable truth: the worst events in your life are the best teachers.

My illness taught me not to take my health or my family for granted. It makes me STRONGLY empathetic to those without healthcare and for our seniors: I got to experience what they ALL go through.

The loss of my businesses? Tenacity - it is the drive that allows me to work 3 jobs: 2 to pay the bills and the kennel job to establish my OWN place - I am the only groomer there, I set my own hours and charge what I want, which is basically like having my own place without the financial risk.

My divorces? That's a mutli-faceted life lesson. The first one taught me how to walk away when things aren't worth saving - starting over scared the life out of me, but it was the best thing to do, and it made it easier to leave other unworthy suitors. The second? Well, I should have listened to my gut and stayed friends instead of settling with him, as I knew deep in my heart that he wasn't what I needed... I was fond of him, but didn't RESPECT him. I made a lot of mistakes with him, and now I'm not repeating those with my beloved Jim. It meant losing my business and home, but I'd do it all over again knowing that Jim was here for me!

You'll find out what you were meant to take away from this in time - I am confident of that! In the meantime, do what you have to do to take your mind off of it and be gentle with yourself... you DESERVE IT!


~ Amanda @ Aljan